Allow me to share with you a lesson I learned from The Pretender. A man who has children is supposed to be both of two things; one, a father, and two a dad. Being a father means that you realize that your child is your offspring; your flesh and blood, and giving them the love they deserve as such. This side of being a parent is not difficult at all, or at least it shouldn't be. Who doesn't love their children? Think about how you felt when you saw Heather for the first time. Did the thought ever cross your mind that the day would come when you would stop loving her? Absolutley not. Parents love their children, despite what their children may think, period. That's why the "father" aspect of parenting is the easy part. The other half of being a parent, being a dad, involves a lot more than just love. Being a dad is being there to meet the needs of your child, no matter what they are or how much of an inconvenience they may be to you, every single day of their lives. It's worrying about them when they're out of your sight; it's being there when they need you most, when they need you the least, and every moment in between; it's motivating them when they're feeling down, and keeping their dreams alive when they're content. Put yourself in Heather's shoes (which shouldn't be hard for you, having been there yourself). Jeff is not being a father to her, or a dad, in any respect whatsoever, at least from what I've seen and heard of him. Sure, you get along with him, and he is her father, but that dosn't excuse any of his behavior. I meant what I said last night. She's just as much my family as you and the boys are, and although I can never be her father, I would very much like to be her dad. I am at her disposal, just as I am at your disposal, and no matter what any of you need, the boys included, I will do everything I can to make sure you get it. When it comes to family there is no such thing as an inconvenience. If I didn't love you as the family member you are to me, you're using my car to pick up heather in Minneapolis every weekend would be a major inconvenience to me, but it isn't because it's a family matter. I just want you, and the boys, and Heather to know that I will always go out of my way to make sure you're all as happy as you can be, no matter what that means for me.